{"id":6284,"date":"2020-05-01T14:47:49","date_gmt":"2020-05-01T14:47:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/?p=6284"},"modified":"2020-05-01T14:47:49","modified_gmt":"2020-05-01T14:47:49","slug":"silas-silage-tangles-with-agricultural-equipment","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/?p=6284","title":{"rendered":"Silas Silage tangles with agricultural equipment"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u00a0Silas Silage makes a welcome return with his unique brand of politically incorrect and unwoke jottings\u2026.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hello everyone! It\u2019s some years since I last wrote for the\nBlog, but it\u2019s nice to see it reappear again after a long absence, with my old\nfriend Mrs Badger taking up her pen to welcome the cuckoo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Talking of Mrs B, I have always felt a yearning for a closer\nrelationship with her, and springtime brings this out in me, despite the fact\nthat we are all locked away because of this virus thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I confessed my longings to my young nephew, who is much more\nexperienced in this kind of thing than me, a solitary country widower.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He gave me some good advice and so the other night when\nthere was a full moon I went into my barn, turned my ipod on and began to\ngyrate and dance in front of my 1985 Massey Ferguson muck-shifting tractor,\nwhich I had just had serviced. I was swerving and bumping just like those\nstrippers you see in the movies, following his advice to the letter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suddenly the barn door flew open and there was Mike from the\nneighbourhood watch. He asked me what I was doing and I explained about my\nproblem and consulting my nephew..<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I explained: \u201cHe said the best thing was to do something\nsexy to a tractor\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I thought is was very rude of him to burst out laughing and head off, slapping his sides. No doubt it will be all round the village, so I thought, Mr Editor, that I would get my version in first.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Baffled? New readers can catch up on the old fart’s (mis)deeds by searching for “Silas Silage” in the search box in the right hand column -Ed<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0Silas Silage makes a welcome return with his unique brand of politically incorrect and unwoke jottings\u2026. Hello everyone! It\u2019s some years since I last wrote for the Blog, but it\u2019s nice to see it reappear again after a long absence, with my old friend Mrs Badger taking up her pen to welcome the cuckoo. Talking … Continue reading “Silas Silage tangles with agricultural equipment”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":23,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2757],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6284","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6glYD-1Dm","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6284","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/23"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6284"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6284\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6285,"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6284\/revisions\/6285"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6284"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6284"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/horsington.blog2.idnet.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6284"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}