April Diary

Regular activities (Village Hall unless stated).
Mondays         Pilates 6pm
Tuesdays         Upholstery 10.30 am , Badminton 8pm,
Wednesdays  Adult tap dancing 10.00 am
Thursdays      Art 10.00
Fridays            Art 10.00

Other Events

Wed 1st        Music Night  Half Moon Inn 8.45pm
Wed 1st        Wincanton Races.  First race 2.20pm
Thurs 2nd   W.I   Mrs Margaret Harper: fused glass jewellery Village Hall 7.30pm
Wed 8th       Pins and Needles. Springfield, Horsington Marsh 2pm Tel.371215
Wed 8th       Milborne Port Opera “Spring Fate” until Saturday 11th 7.30pm More . . .
Thurs 9th     Parish Council Meeting Village Hall 7.30pm
Mon 13th       Ladies Lunch Group  Three Horseshoes, Batcombe
Tues 14th       North Cheriton Gardener’s Society
Sat 19th         Wincanton Races. Children’s Day from 1100am
Wed 22nd     Film “The Lady” King Arthur’s School

St John’s Church services

2nd April          Maundy Thursday 7.30pm Holy Communion at Templecombe
3rd April          Good Friday 7.30pm: a Service of Hymns and Readings
5th April           Easter Sunday 9.15am Holy Communion with Sunday School
12th April         11.am Morning Prayer
19th April        9.15am Holy Communion
26th April        8.30am Holy Communion (BCP)

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Election fever grips Horsington

Mrs Badger writes . . .

Dear Editor,

I am very disappointed on the level of election coverage in the Blog. I would have hoped for some erudite comment and some forensic analysis of the various policies on offer from the different parties. When my late husband was alive he would be up all night poring over magazines and websites, studying the finer points of the election debate.

I live alone, and would welcome some advice on where to place my vote.

Amelia Badger (Mrs)

The Blog’s political correspondent Kevin Mustard has sent us this postcard.  He says that on the fees the Blog pays him, it’s all we can expect, but we hope he will file something more substantial before the big day -Ed
You kip low res

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Spring Fate selling out – still tickets for Saturday

Richard Gaunt as Donovitz and Lloyd Davies as Linz in "Spring Fate" at Milborne Port Village hall

Richard Gaunt as Donovitz and Lloyd Davies as Linz in “Spring Fate” at Milborne Port Village Hall (Picture: Andrew Lakeman)

Milborne Port Opera’s “Spring Fate” opened on Wednesday 6 April to a very warm reception. Thursday is virtually full, Friday is SOLD OUT, but there are still a few tickets left for Saturday.

Take advantage of the lovely weather and the dearth of watchable TV programmes on Saturday nights and treat yourelves to a live show!  Tickets 07926 983 585

5x7ad landscape red_1Read the review on Fine Times Recorder

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Watch your speed!

According to the “Western Gazette”, the Boys in Blue are out there looking for speeding motorists. Clearly no Blog reader would do this, but you might want to pass the information on to others as a warning.

Here are the current locations of speed detection cameras:
They seem to have the area pretty well covered!

A303 2 1/4 miles east of Wincanton (70mph) Site: 6129
A303 2 miles west of Wincanton (70mph) Site: 6042
A303 2/3 mile east of Wincanton (70mph) Site: 6128
A303 3 miles east of Sparkford – eastbound (70mph) Site: 6026
A303 3 miles east of Sparkford – westbound (70mph) Site: 6047
A359 Cole Road, Pitcombe (30mph) Site: 6106
Bayford Hill, Wincanton (30mph) Site: 6030

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Don’t go near the water!

Horsington Pond infested with killer fish – did the butler do it?

Horsington Pond

It may look like a peaceful village pond to you, but what’s under the surface?

There’s something nasty beneath the calm pellucid waters of Horsington Pond. It seems a flock (er-what? –Ed) of carnivorous fish have made their way into the pond, and are making a meal of anyone – or their feet at least – who goes near the water.

The fish are a breed called garra rufa obtusas, or “Doctor fish”, used for carrying out so-called fish pedicures in spas and hairdressers. The little blighters nibble away at all your dead skin, treating any infections and returning your feet to pristine condition.

So how did they get into the pond?  Police are dismissing the theory that they escaped from a local hairdressing salon on the grounds that there are no hairdressers upstream of the pond. However the brook which feeds the pond passes through the gardens of, or near, some of Horsington’s most prestigious and expensive residences – including Horsington House, Horsington Manor and the Grange, and the area is known for its upmarket and well-heeled residents.

Police believe that someone may have kept the animals as domestic pets, using them for the occasional toe job. Then, perhaps while they were away, a well-meaning cleaner or butler may have accidently pulled the plug.

The bad news is that these creatures only eat human skin and flesh, and no-one knows what a domesticated strain will do when they are released into the wild. As a result, cautionary warning notices have been erected around the pond and people have been advised to keep away.

Horsington Pond

You have been warned!

However, animal rights activists have claimed that to deprive the fish of human flesh will starve them, and this amounts to terrible and unwarranted cruelty.

Is our quiet village going to be besieged by activists and fish campaigners?  Or overrun by foot tourists? Will it put local hairdressers out of business? Local politicians better be prepared, as it’s a potential vote loser in the sensitive run-up to the elections.

We understand   a SSDC meeting to discuss the matter , scheduled for April 1st, has been mysteriously postponed.

We shall, of course, keep you informed!

Anonymous Horsington residents take advantage of the disaster for a free body scrub

Anonymous Horsington residents take advantage of the disaster for a free body scrub

Horsington Pond in happier times

Horsington Pond in happier times

Posted in Humour, News | 1 Comment

Engage brains – Easter Sunday Pub Quiz at the Half Moon


The traditional Half Moon Inn Easter Holiday Quiz will be held on Easter Sunday, 5th April, at 8pm. Usual format. Teams of 4 -ish. Leave your mobiles at home.
This Easter the quiz will be set by Andrew Tarling, who has recently returned from a weekend in the Baltic. Better mug up on Latvian mythology, pop charts and football results!.

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Spring Fate Trailer


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Award-winning Milborne Port Opera prepares to punch above its weight again

5x7ad landscape red_1Milborne Port Opera are staging their latest show, “Spring Fate” after Easter.

It is spring 1914. The war clouds are gathering over Europe and Sir Edward Grey, the British Foreign Secretary, is rehearsing his famous soundbite “The lights are going out all over Europe. We shall not see them lit again in our time”.

Are they bothered in Lancashire? –NO! The Earl of Westhoughton and his wife Lady Blackrod are preparing to host a lavish garden party and evening ‘do’ at their palatial mansion Anderton Hall. And what a party it will be, with hundreds of guests, and circus performers and international cabaret acts to entertain them in style.

But there are some tensions. No playwright worth his salt would write a play without tensions.

The fact is that neither the Earl nor his Uncle William (a famous explorer, newly returned from somewhere or other), are enjoying the best of marriages.  And cousin Eugene has just been shot.

The unfortunate Eugene has placed some highly sensitive documents in the safe and the future of the British Empire depends on their contents remaining secret.

But the party is buzzing with spies, assassins and intriguers, all hell bent on getting hold of the papers. Some are disguised as aristocratic German tourists, others as circus performers.

And all of them can sing!

Combine these magical elements and you have Neil Edwards’ new comedy musical “Spring Fate”, his third work for Milborne Port Opera. The music has been inspired, re written or arranged from the work of Ivan Caryll a largely forgotten theatre composer from the 1900’s. A prolific writer, performed on both sides of the Atlantic, he had the record of  5 shows running simultanaously in London’s West End in 1905.

Caryll was the natural successor to Gilbert & Sullivan and was the agent who transformed light operetta into musical theatre at the dawning of the jazz age.

Neil Edwards is an accomplished writer and musician, as well as no mean performer.

His previous works at Milborne Port are “The Lost Continent of Love”, “The Murder at Shakerley House” and now, “Spring Fate”. All three share outlandish plots, outrageous characters, and wonderful humour, which you might compare with “Allo Allo” or the “Goon show”. The music is great too.

Milborne Port Opera is a small  amateur company which regularly punches above its weight and  wins awards. In its 26 years of existence it has performed every single work by Gilbert & Sullivan, as well as other musicals. It is rare among similar organisations in that it is prepared to take the risk  to encourage and perform original works.

Spring Fate is accompanied by an 11 piece band under the direction of Caroline d’Cruz, recently nominated for the award of Best Musical Director in the Somerset Drama awards. Milborne Port won the “Show Stopper” award, and will no doubt be hoping for another next year.

The show runs at the Milborne Port Village Hall from April 8-10, the week after Easter. Tickets from boxoffice@milborneportopera.co.uk Telephone 07926 983585.

See if you can spot any Horsington residents on the stage or in the orchestra. There are three -Ed.

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Pub Quiz – The result reversed!

WhitehorselogoFurther research reveals that David Beckham actually began his professional career at Manchester United, not Preston North End. So in fact the Ted Banks appreciation Society won the White Horse charity quiz on Sunday.

Being sportsmen and gentlemen, they will not be asking for the return of the prizes and a re-run. But watch out next time!

See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Beckham


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Winterbourne’s Cheltenham results

JollyAllan – Lost
Mendip Express -Lost
Bit of a Puzzle – 3rd at 16-1
Annie Power – Fell at the last, convincingly in front, dashing the hopes of thousands of Irishmen with Willie Mullins accumulators, and saving the bookmaking industry from ruin.

Activial – 3rd at 17-2
At least Winterbourne got one thing right!  In the Cross country event Toutancarmont , the French horse, made an unscheduled  and unseemly left turn and careered into the rails when nicely poised for victory.

Hernryville  – 4th at 50-1, a nice each way coup
Edeymi -lost

Black Friday
Thomas Brown -lost
Fletchers Flyer  -lost
Jollys Cracked it- lost
Karinga Dancer – non runner

Winterboune Longjohns adds this comment:
“Will you make it clear to my readers, if any still exist , that I have absolutely no connection with Winterboune View, the eponymous private care home for those with special needs  in Bristol, that was  recently closed after revelations of physical abuse!

I am am sure  it would not have occurred to anyone – until you mentioned it! -Ed

Your editor was £250 up on the week, mainly by ignoring the Blog’s recommendations and subscribing to a professional tipping service.


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